To run away or not to run away?

My goodness… I had one of the worst days ever yesterday. I haven’t had a particularly good week altogether so yesterday just topped it off.

Without going into too much detail for fear that I might be found out and fired. I will say that my work situation is hostile and very uncomfortable. I have a boss who is very biased, unconventional, and unable to be objective. I am treated more like a red-headed step child than an employee and I am not allowed to treat her like the wicked step mother that she is. I was blasted yet again for something that I am not allowed to defend myself against and I am just expected to take it and do as I am told.

I grew up with a father who was this very same way. i.e. It was his way or the highway and I was not allowed to have an opinion or argument in anything he disagreed with. I do not deal with this well. When you push me into a corner and give me no chance to escape I will blow. I blew yesterday. Not out loud, not to anyone at work. I was just miserable. I spent the entire day holding back tears so when I went to sleep last night my throat was sore from my valiant attempts at keeping myself composed.

Robert and I are also having  a bit of trouble with the purchase of our new home. We have run into some set backs that we did not plan for and it is making every waking hour more stressful. That played into yesterdays breakdown as well. I really hate feeling that way and I am glad the day is over. I can start fresh today and be thankful it is behind me. One more day and then it’s the weekend. Thank goodness!

On a more goal related note; I did carry out two more goals that I forgot about in my previous post. I ordered new eye glasses through costco. I ordered two pair so I could mix it up a bit and see if I liked wired rim or hard plastic more. It was so much cheaper to go through costco than my real eye doctor so I saved money too! I also completed my goal of creating a living space in our back bedroom. However it is not done the way I would prefer but there just isn’t enough space. We got rid of the double bed we had back there and bought a futon to replace it. We had to get rid of the office so baby had a room. There is also no space for a desk in the back bedroom. So we bought a portable filing system and have our important documents in that. This back room has also become Vixen’s room with her food, water, bed, and kennell in there. Mission accomplished!

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Blah…

I was just reading my earlier post and thought I would update that a bit. We did buy my gun and I take my class this month. I haven’t shot it yet but I will. We also made an offer on a house. A really great one that I’m afraid we won’t get now. Just with the loan program we’re using and getting the financing all together we need more time and they set the closing at March 12th. I don’t think it is possible!

As far as baby goes: Yesterday it was the size of an apple and about 3 oz. We find out the sex on February 11th and that day can not come soon enough! Everyone thinks it will be a boy. We’ll see.

I don’t think I have accomplished any of my goals but I’ll go take a look and see if I have more to update about.

On a side note I am bummed out for the people I love. It seems like the season to be down. A few people very close to my heart are just feeling crappy. About lot’s of things. Their weight, their family, their life in general. I wish I knew what to say to people to make them feel better. All I can think of is take it one day at a time and try not to get overwhelmed!

Excited!!!

We bought a gun 🙂 A 9mm slim line pistol. It’s sexy! I can easily cock it and it fits nicely in my hand. I’m stoked! Now I just need to get my concealed weapons permit which is easy cheesy.

More exciting news… We are looking at buying another house. I could not be more excited about this. I should have made this a goal. Not sure why I didn’t. There are some great loan programs out there and we are going to rent our current house out (scary)!!! There are a lot of houses out there though and we are maxing out our budget at $275,000.00. Not because we can’t get approved for more. We can. But, because I don’t want us to strap ourselves with the monthly payment. I like having the freedom to spend.

One more month and we find out the sex of the baby. Can’t wait for that. Then, I will have plenty to update this site with. I can post all the pics of the furniture we get. If you didn’t notice I am so excited! Life is great right now. I couldn’t ask for more.

Bon Voyage’ 2009

Today is January 4, 2010. Already four days into the new year. As they have in the past I’m sure this year will fly by.

I am excited for this new year and decade but still a bit sad to see 2009 go.

 In 2009 I married my best friend. I was blessed with getting pregnant. I found some amazing new friends who I wonder how I went this long without. I watched my best friend marry after years of telling me she never would. My parents decided they really were meant for each other and got back together after a year-long separation. I got passed some very haunting demons and learned to live a much happier life. All of this was just in 2009. Imagine if I highlighted every year in the last decade!

Don’t worry I won’t. lol But, I will say I went from being a sophomore in high school to being 25 years old, married for the second time and pregnant with my first child.  I admit I made some mistakes along the way but I am sure glad I made it to where I am today. Here’s to 2010 and all the amazing times ahead!!